TOMMY ZANE REPORTS: Ever get that feeling that you just can’t score? Do you go weeks, months, or (Goddess forbid) years without sex? I know it may seem hard to believe, but us gay folks can have a dry spell too, even the pretty ones. I have an answer for all you queer love losers out there — bring on the straight girls! That’s right — there’s nothing like some sexy, trendy and confident straight women to make your bod all the more attractive. Just this weekend, I was up in Chelsea on business and my dear friend Maria was […]
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GAYBO: Election Blues For The Reds; Dulliah, Queen of the Dumb Down; Che Target Losing Its Mojo?
Amazing how seven days can change the world’ Nothing could ever replace the sated feeling I had watching those pathetic Santorum children crying as Daddy conceded the election. Boo fucking hoo! Now, back to Virginia where you really fucking live. I’m sure Santorum will end up on some Republican’t committee or something. I’m just happy to have him out of PA’s hair. There’s absolutely nothing Philly about him. He probably thinks the Rocky statue belongs on the Art Museum steps. Fucking loser. And as for “Fast Eddie” Rendell, Nancy Pelosi and all the winning Democrats, I say, congratulations — let’s […]
GAYBO: First We Take Santorum; Joan Collins At The Forrest; Woody’s For Sale?
TOMMY ZANE REPORTS: It’s Election Eve 2006 and I’m just up to my ears in excitement! Now, remember to stick to the plan: First we take Santorum, then the rest of The GOP in 2008. The Hillary/Obama ticket is gonna rock those Republican bitches into the next decade! You may ask, is the world ready for a dyke and a black man? HELLS YES! If the last eight years has proven anything it is this: You simply cannot drop the soap in front of a Republican. It’s too risky. Republicans are just too unstable, too many are just barely holding […]
GAYBO: My Big Gay Tummy, Why Jersey Is For Sister Lovers & The Return Of Judy Garland Park
TOMMY ZANE REPORTS: One of my dear friends always thinks he’s fat. He has, like, 2% body fat. Still, on and on with the food games, skipping lunch, just a salad, etc. He’s a transplant from Iowa, so what does he know about Philly eating? I, on the other hand, have adjusted quite well to the two great Philly pastimes: eating cheesesteaks and laying down, preferably at the same time. I’m not fat, mind you, and I get lots of sexercise to burn it off — I think that’s the key to being sensibly trim. But this bitch is fucking […]
Introducing: Gaybo, Our New Queer Affairs Column
Editor’s Note: Are you gay and read Phawker? Or just thinking about it? Becoming gay that is. Because, you know, you ‘heard good things.’ Are you straight but curious how the other team plays? Congressman, we have heard your call and answered your prayers. Our Gaydar Editor Tommy Zane is gay all day and queer for a year, and like all gays he is wickedly funny, stylish, tidy and knows from window treatments. He may be going to hell, but most of our straight friends are, too. So, without further ado, we give you the first installment of GAYBO. We’ll […]
BEING THERE: Shamir @ Making Time
Photo by DYLAN LONG Making Time celebrated its 15th anniversary in grand fashion last night at the Philly gayborhood’s Voyeur Nightclub, with a highly anticipated headlining set from dance-pop’s biggest and newest up-and-comer, Shamir. The 20 year-old sensation from Las Vegas has set himself apart from the pack with his breathtaking countertenor, lovely persona and vibrant variety of songs. Popping up on stage a few minutes after midnight to an immense roar from the hyped up crowd, Shamir knew exactly what kind of time the club was looking for as he kicked off his set with a pep in his […]
PAPERBOY: Slow-Jamming The Alt-Weeklies
BY DAVE ALLEN Like time, news waits for no man. Keeping up with the funny papers has always been an all-day job, even in the pre-Internets era. These days, however, it’s a two-man job. That’s right, these days you need someone to do your reading for you, or risk falling hopelessly behind and, as a result, increasing your chances of dying lonely and somewhat bitter. That’s why every week PAPERBOY does your alt-weekly reading for you. We pore over those time-consuming cover stories and give you the takeaway, suss out the cover art, warn you off the ink-wasters and steer […]
PAPERBOY: Slow-Jamming The Alt-Weeklies
BY DAVE ALLEN Like time, news waits for no man. Keeping up with the funny papers has always been an all-day job, even in the pre-Internets era. These days, however, it’s a two-man job. That’s right, these days you need someone to do your reading for you, or risk falling hopelessly behind and, as a result, increasing your chances of dying lonely and somewhat bitter. That’s why every week PAPERBOY does your alt-weekly reading for you. We pore over those time-consuming cover stories and give you the takeaway, suss out the cover art, warn you off the ink-wasters and steer […]
TRUTH IS OUT THERE: Was Balloon Boy A Fraud?
[Artwork by Chris Toumanian] ASSOCIATED PRESS: The disappearance and sudden discovery of the boy have raised questions about whether it was all an elaborate attention-getting stunt orchestrated by the Heenes or simply a bizarre case of a child who ran away and hid after getting spooked by a scolding from his father. Larimer County Sheriff Jim Alderden said authorities do not believe at this point if it was a hoax but he would meet with investigators Friday to decide whether to look into the matter further. Asked during an impromptu news conference outside his house whether the incident was a […]
GAYDAR: Sarah, You CANNOT ‘Pray Away The Gay’
BY AARON STELLA GAYDAR EDITOR Wayne Besen, executive director of Truth Wins Out, an organization fighting right wing lies and the “ex-gay” fraud, recently urged Sarah Palin to “come out” about her church’s beliefs about ex-gay ministries. Palin’s church supported an ex-gay conference that was held in Anchorage on September 10th, 2008. According to TWO, Palin agrees that homosexuality can be cured through prayer—so every god-fearing Christian needs to join the crusade. What Palin’s church and other religious sects affiliated with ex-gay ministries withhold from the public is how few homosexuals have been “cured” and how many have run […]
GAYDAR: Let’s Get Baked!
BY AARON STELLA GAYDAR EDITOR It happened on the fairest of Thursdays that I had the pleasure of lunching with two of Brooklyn’s hottest new specialty bakery owners, Matt Lewis and Renato Poliafito. Lately, A-list celebrities have been helping to disseminate news of their revamped line of sugary, and not so sugary treats. Lewis and Poliafito’s Sweet and Salty Cake was recently featured on Martha Stewart; their brownies were featured on the Today show and selected as one of Oprah’s favorite things. And now, for the first time, the duo share some of their treasured secrets in BAKED: […]
GAYDAR: To Be Young And Gay In Philadelphia
BY AARON STELLA Welcome one and all to the brand spanking new Phawker gay column called … drumroll, please … GAYDAR. My name is Aaron Stella, at your service, and I am proud to succeed Miss Tommy Zane — whose honesty and sharp wit made us laugh and invited us to share in his vision of the gay life in our fair city. I’m a bit younger than Zane — only 22, part of the troupe he might call “you young things” — but I’ve got plenty to say, and there’s never a time I haven’t got a hurricane brewing […]
Iran Not Totally Straight, But Definitely Less Gay
[Illustration by ALEX FINE] TEHRAN (Reuters) — Iran’s president was misrepresented by Western media when he was quoted saying there were no gays in Iran, and actually meant there were not so many as in the United States, a presidential aide said on Wednesday.