ASSOCIATED PRESS: BARSTOW, Calif. (AP) — A pack of pit bulls surrounded a woman [NOT pictured] and mauled her to death, authorities said Wednesday. Police found Kelly Caldwell, 45, lying in the street around 9:30 p.m. Tuesday, and took her to a hospital, where she later died, the San Bernardino County sheriff’s department said. After the mauling, the dogs ran to a nearby house. Deputies shot one dog to death when it returned to the scene and acted aggressively as paramedics were trying to save Caldwell’s life, authorities said.A second dog was shot to death Wednesday morning when it, too, […]
BREAKING: Death of the ‘Peoples’ Prime Minister’
NEW YORK TIMES: RAWALPINDI, Islamabad — An attack on a political rally killed the Pakistani opposition leader Benazir Bhutto near the capital, Islamabad, Thursday. Witnesses said Ms. Bhutto was fired upon before the blast, and an official from her party said Ms. Bhutto was further injured by the explosion, which was apparently caused by a suicide attacker. At least a dozen more people were killed. “At 6:16 p.m. she expired,” said Wasif Ali Khan, a member of Ms. Bhutto’s party who was at Rawalpindi General Hospital where she was taken after the attack, according to The Associated Press. Hundreds of […]
DISINHERITED: Paris Hilton Is Broke
FORTUNE: NEW YORK — The Hilton family patriarch, Barron Hilton, will pass on the $1.2 billion windfall from the sale of Hilton Hotels Corporation — not to his famous progeny, but to his family’s philanthropic foundation, Fortune has learned. Barron Hilton’s donation will effectively double the size of the Conrad N. Hilton Foundation, named after Barron’s father, the man who built Hilton Hotels from scratch and great-grandfather of celebutantes Paris and Nicky Hilton. In a statement e-mailed to Fortune, Barron Hilton wrote: “My personal net worth today, including created trusts, is approximately $2.3 billion, and what ever value it is […]
FUNNY PAPERS: When Having Fun Is Job Number One
[Courtesy of MARRIED TO THE SEA]
TODAY I SAW…
BY JEFF DEENEY TODAY I SAW a crowd of boys and girls playing with their Christmas toys in front of a dingy brown brick three-story low rise at the Bartram Village projects in the southwest. A couple of the little boys got remote control monster trucks and were making them zip along the concrete path that winds between the clusters of apartment buildings. One boy in a brown parka with a fur lined hood made his truck duck under the low railing made from black-painted metal pipes that follows the entire length of the path. The truck wildly bounded along […]
MASH-UP: Winnie The Pooh/Apocalypse Now
Most excellent.
NEWS CLUES: It’s Like Adderall For Your Eyeballs
CLARIFICATION: Adolf Hitler NOT ‘Good,’ Says Will Smith LOS ANGELES — Will Smith is angry over celebrity gossip Web site articles that he said misinterpreted a recent remark he made in a Scottish newspaper about Adolf Hitler. In a story published Saturday in the Daily Record, Smith was quoted saying: “Even Hitler didn’t wake up going, ‘let me do the most evil thing I can do today.’ I think he woke up in the morning and using a twisted, backwards logic, he set out to do what he thought was ‘good.’” The quote was preceded by the writer’s observation: “Remarkably, […]
ANIMAL INTIFADA: S.F. Tiger Escapes, Kills 1, Maims 2
SAN FRANCISCO — Investigators trying to determine how a tiger escaped its enclosure at the San Francisco Zoo, killing one visitor and mauling two others on Christmas, planned a thorough sweep of the zoo grounds Wednesday to look for clues. The two injured men were listed in stable condition at San Francisco General Hospital. Dr. John Brown, an emergency room physician, told ABC’s “Good Morning America” on Wednesday they suffered deep bites and claw cuts to their heads, necks, arms and hands. “These injuries are severe injuries, but they are very treatable,” Brown said, “and these two gentlemen seem to […]
ALL I GOT FOR CHRISTMAS: Little Drummer Boy
Phawker reader Jack Quinn sent in this pic of the Keith Moon starter kit Santa left behind. Rock on, duderino!
KILLADELPHIA: Two More Dead Since U Went To Bed
INQUIRER: A man was found shot to death in West Philadelphia on Christmas night, police said.The body of Shawn McKnight, 35, was found dead between a car and a cherry-picker truck in the 400 block of North 60th Street near Haverford Avenue last night. He had been shot multiple times in the chest. McKnight was taken to the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania where he was pronounced dead just after 8 p.m., police said. Police believe that McNight may have been a victim of an attempted robbery gone awry. * A North Philadelphia man was fatally shot last night […]
THIS JUST IN: Merry Christmas To All
And to all a good night and good luck!
DECLASSIFIED: FBI Plan To Suspend Habeas Corpus & Detain 12,000 ‘Disloyal’ Americans In Military Prisons
NEW YORK TIMES: A newly declassified document shows that J. Edgar Hoover, the longtime director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, had a plan to suspend habeas corpus and imprison some 12,000 Americans he suspected of disloyalty. Hoover sent his plan to the White House on July 7, 1950, 12 days after the Korean War began. It envisioned putting suspect Americans in military prisons. Hoover wanted President Harry S. Truman to proclaim the mass arrests necessary to “protect the country against treason, espionage and sabotage.” The F.B.I would “apprehend all individuals potentially dangerous” to national security, Hoover’s proposal said. The […]
TAO OF EVA: Japan-dy Warhol
Hey Boss, I’ve got a slew of funny/random/stupid video commercials i can send you from this japanese land. heres the first one. Andy Warhol for DTK TV. Ironic at all? Love, EVA