SIDEWALKING: We Three Kings

Jay-Z, Kanye, Macca, Costume Institute Gala, Metropolitan Museum of Art ASSOCIATED PRESS: A who’s who of Hollywood and fashion elite hit the red carpet to celebrate the annual Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute Gala Benefit. The theme for Monday night’s event was “Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty” to coincide with an elaborate new museum exhibition that highlights the work of the late designer, who committed suicide in February 2010 at age 40. “I miss him terribly, not only as a person but as a designer,” said a visibly emotional Madonna, who was wearing an icy blue gown by Stella McCartney. […]

PORTRAIT OF THE ARTIST AS A MIDDLE-AGED MAN: A Q&A With Dan Clowes, Cartoonist Extraordinaire

BY JONATHAN VALANIA Daniel Clowes’ 30-plus-year career as a cartoonist/graphic novelist/screenwriter has seen some remarkable reversals of fortune. Back in the mid-80s, when Clowes was fresh out of Pratt and looking to take the graphic design/illustration world by storm, he couldn’t get art directors to return his phone calls.  These days, post-Ghost World, the New Yorker and The New York Times plead with him to return their calls. When not busy cranking out darkly hilarious comic works like Eightball, Dan Pussey and David Boring, or illustrating Ramones videos and Supersuckers album covers, or working with Coke to create the infamous […]

SH*T MY UNCLE SAYS: Donald Trump Is A Giant Tool

[Illustration by ALEX FINE] BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Folks, I tried for months to find at least one decent thing to say about this douchebag dictator wannabe, but, alas, I finally abandoned the project after being informed that even the “last rites” had written him off. Perhaps they too had found that: This is the self-styled history buff who discovered, much to the President’s barely disguised glee (heh, heh), that Hawaii isn’t a third world East African nation after all. This is the Obama ascension asperser (Google it) whose old man’s MONEY and INFLUENCE have made the line “I couldn’t […]

COMING ATTRACTION: Q&A With Dan Clowes

Cartoonist/screenwriter Dan Clowes comes to the Free Library on Tuesday to promote the recent publication of the aptly-titled Mr. Wonderful. Long a fan of Mr. Clowes’ work, we got him on the horn to discuss recent work like Wilson and Mr. Wonderful along with Ghost World, Lloyd Llewellyn, Eightball, Jack Black, Like A Velvet Glove Cast In Iron, Thora Birch, Art School Confidential, Rudy Rucker, Raiders Of The Lost Ark, Michel Gondry and the advantages of male pattern baldness. Look for it tomorrow on a Phawker near you! MOHAMMED RAFI: Jaan Pehechaan Ho WIKIPEDIA: Jaan Pehechan Ho was a popular […]

Two Billion Royal Rubberneckers Can’t Be Wrong?

BY REBECCA GOODACRE If you had asked any of my British counterparts a week ago their feelings on the Royal Wedding, I’m pretty sure they would have feigned utter disgust and scoffed at the mere thought of having anything to do with that blue blooded monstrosity.  Yet, television ratings from Friday say that the Royal wedding had a 70% share of viewers and an estimated 34 million Brits bore witness to the event, not to mention the extra million who turned up in London to watch the proceedings first hand.  Something’s not quite adding up. Now these aren’t 35 million […]

BLOTTO #13: Kick Out The Jams, Motherf*cker

BY LANCE DOILEY Yeah, I live in my truck. I own property of course, but the house that was willed to me has been rendered practically uninhabitable due to years of neglect and arson. If it’s an exceptionally hot day out I might sleep in the cool confines of my crawlspace, but nine times out of 10 I run to the rig. It’s not something I should be proud of since I’m union-protected and bring home an average of 65-70K a year, but with the lifestyle I lead I just don’t see the point. Wasn’t a concern of mine since […]

SIDEWALKING: Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere

Neil Young’s tour bus, Tower Theater, 8:07 PM Saturday night BY JONATHAN VALANIA SET LIST: My My, Hey Hey (Out of the Blue) / Tell Me Why / Helpless / You Never Call / Peaceful Valley Boulevard / Love and War / Down By The River / Hitchhiker / Ohio / Sign Of Love / Leia / After The Gold Rush / I Believe In You / Rumblin’ / Cortez the Killer / Cinnamon Girl/Walk With Me  

FAUX NEWS: Fox News Still Unable (Or Unwilling) To Tell The Difference Between Osama And Obama

This is a an actual screen grab of Fox News’ breaking report last night on the death of Osama. RELATED: According to CNN, “[t]here are photographs of the body with a gunshot wound to the side of the head that shows an individual who is not unrecognizable as bin Laden. No decision has yet been made on whether to release the photographs and if so, when and how.” MORE RELATED: The New Yorker has a round-up of the latest information, including a photo of the compound where bin Laden was hiding out

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: Osama Bin Laden Is Dead

[Painting by DON COKER] Eight years to the day that Bush stood on an aircraft carrier and declared ‘Mission Accomplished,’ Osama has reportedly been killed in a firefight with U.S. forces in a mansion in Abbotabad, Pakistan. The U.S. now has custody of his corpse. No U.S. personnel were wounded in the operation. RELATED: American officials said Bin Laden resisted and was shot in the head. He was later buried at sea. RELATED: Apprentice pre-empted. RELATED: Fox News still assholes. RELATED: Is It Possible ‘Osama’s Hideout’ Was On Google Maps All Along? UPDATE: Live-Tweeting White House conference call media briefing. […]