SPORTO: Did It Just Get Drunk In Here?

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BY MIKE WOLVERTON SPORTS GUY Things change quickly in sports. A week ago the Eagles took the lead in the NFC East, but they still looked like a 3 or 4 seed at best and were clearly a notch below the top two, New Orleans and Minnesota. Fast forward seven days and the Saints just lost, the Vikings just lost, and the Eagles have won five in a row. Suddenly a #2 seed and a bye week are within reach. The Birds will hold the tiebreaker against Minnesota, but the Vikings will have to slip up in one of their last two games and the Eagles will have to win both of theirs. Minnesota goes to Chicago next week and finishes with the Giants. The Bears are quietly putting together the most disappointing season in the league; they scored zero points on offense Sunday and turned it over six times. A buddy of mine is a Bears fan and he thought his whole world had changed when the Bears got Jay Cutler. Instead, Cutler is a steep dropoff from Kyle Orton. The Bears have one win in the last two months, and it came against the Rams. These sad sacks aren’t going to beat Minnesota, so it will be up to the Giants in Week 17. As hard as it might be, Eagles fans should root for the Giants tonight so New York stays in the race and motivated for that final game.

I watched Sunday’s Eagles game through the warped prism of Fantasy Football Playoffs, as I have Donovan (good start, then nuthin’ but some yards and a couple picks). One of life’s consistent truths is that nobody cares about other people’s fantasy football teams, so I won’t bore you with mine. Suffice to say, I am just sooo sick of Ben Roethlisberger. This guy is garbage if I am rooting for the Steelers and totally unstoppable if I am rooting against them. Roethlisberger led the Steelers to a measly six points last week against Cleveland and their 31st ranked defense. This week against the league’s third-ranked pass D he set a franchise record with 503 yards and threw a winning touchdown on the game’s final play. Fuck you, Ben. Step One in my recovery from yesterday’s Fantasy debacle will be watching the Steelers miss the playoffs. The only thing I can take from Sunday is that I learned something: bitterness + alcohol does not equal happiness, bitterness + alcohol = even more bitterness + hangover.

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