INSTA-REVIEW: 5 Things You Should Know About Van Halen At The Wachovia Center Last Night

1. Wolfgang Van Halen (who’s replaced the recently shitcanned Michael Anthony), it must be said, could use a little of mom’s Jenny Craig action. But hell, he’s only 16 so we’ll call it baby fat. Decent enough bass player, but really, who even knew Van Halen had a bass player anyway?

2. Say goodbye to Diamond Dave, say hello to Gold Brocade Dave. Simon LeBon‘s closet is short a jacket.

3. Alex Van Halen: Still rocking the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles headband. Ya gotta give the guy props for sticking by his guns. For some the Flashdance look was passing fad, but Alex is a lifer.

4. Out-of-place celebrity sighting: Howard Eskin, looking perfectly frosted-and-tipped, being escorted into the front rows to . . . what? Rock out with drunk union carpenters?

5. Overall, Van Halen seems rehearsed within an inch of their lives, everybody’s in shape, Dave’s voice is as good as it’s going to get, and Edward is, well, Edward — thy name is still ‘shred’ incarnate. These guys are gonna get paid. –AMY Z. QUINN

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