BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Last week, Paul Ryan (you remember him, he’s the guy whose selection was sure to put Mitt over the top) proclaimed the following: “Mitt Romney and I lost not because of ideas, but due to ineffective communication. President Obama and Vice President Biden also prevailed because they did a better job with ‘technology and (voter) turnout.’” Hey, Paul, do me a grand favor. Savor those words, cherish them, embrace them, nurture them, memorize them! Above all, promise me you’ll take every opportunity possible to repeat them especially whenever there’s even the slightest chance they’ll be […]

Illustration by ALEX FINE BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Duly appreciative of the Oscars, Emmys, Tonys, and Pulitzers — all of which are indeed honorable — I believe the time has come to establish a new and entirely different type of awards program. A completely cynical national dishonors program, if you will. One that judges and affords official recognition of and to the worst. The very worst in American politics, that is. I propose to call this new program the American Scumbucket Awards. Nicknamed the Scummys, and represented by a rusty statuette of a smiling, pants-down George W. Bush perched on […]

  1. Some $500 billion of hard-earned taxpayer money will be squandered in the next 12 months in the form of corporate welfare and archaic, outmoded, completely useless military overkill. As usual, the giveaway will be perpetrated by literally thousands of the most consistently hypocritical bastards on the face of the earth, i.e., your elected local, state and national representatives. Surprisingly, it will be condoned (in at least one instance) by a somewhat two-faced but nevertheless respected national publication. 2. Under federal law, marijuana use and distribution is still illegal. Period. Just because Colorado and Washington state have taken the […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Recently I authored a piece on the fiscal impasse that showcased the deceit of the military/industrial complex and its partners in arms the cowardly and complicit in the Democratic and Republican parties, and the scapegoat social welfare programs on which they’re trying to pin the rap. Now I’d like to shed a little light on the second most rogue elephant in the rooms of capitol hill. It’s called “corporate” welfare. It’s the aptly named, equally insidious, other nasty little secret the One Percenters and their Washington minions are loathe to talk about lest they be […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY In the coming weeks, look for Republicans to offer a percentage point or two increase in the top tax rate in exchange for slashed spending on social welfare programs, and parade it as evidence of their willingness to “compromise.” How magnanimous. Even more deceitful, however, pay particular notice to the fact that neither party will even hint at reasonable, let alone drastic, reductions in our barbarous military squandering — call it the ultimate “hawk” that never gets dredged up and expelled — when they present their respective Pecksniffian “equitable” and “responsible” (do not under any […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Okay, I’ll come clean. Obama has been my leader of choice from the get-go and nothing whatsoever I’ve heard from or about the other guy has so much as twitched the needle on my partiality meter. I will, however, admit to an atom of admiration for Romney’s extraordinary chameleon-like ability to change his stance on any given issue to suit the exigency at hand. It’s a talent even a squid could envy. But I digress. Most significantly, I hold unwaveringly to the belief that Barak is simply more concerned about more of us. I continue […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY The surprise appearance of George W. Bush at Tuesday’s debate, albeit in the form of a question from an undecided voter — as in ‘please tell us Governor Romney how you will NOT be just like George W. Bush’ — reminded me that I almost feel sorry for the guy. Almost. I suppose I could be accused of heresy for feeling the way I do about George Bush’s ostracism from all of impolite Republican society lately. Maybe it’s more a feeling of genuine puzzlement than anything else. I mean, it seems like the guy just […]

Artwork by DONKEYHOTEY BY WILLIAM C. HENRY H.L. Mencken famously said, “For every complex problem, there is an answer that is clear, simple and wrong.” In the upcoming election Americans will be presented with a choice between what the Republican nominee and his V.P. for everything budgetary would have them believe is the only answer to the complex economic problem of continuing budget deficits and mounting national debt, namely, a complete dismantling of the social welfare system as we know it, and a mufti-faceted alternative that is clear, pretty cut-and-dried and altogether righteous. This latter approach entails: 1) no longer […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY “And that’s all they’re going to get.”  Quoth the man who would be President upon being asked  by a reporter about his lack of customary disclosure of several years tax returns as well as his reaction to criticism of the conflicting paper trail surrounding his involvement with Bain Capital, plus his failure to explain in any up-front manner the justification for his ownership of off-shore bank accounts in the Bahamas, Cayman Islands, Switzerland, and elsewhere. Never before in the annals of presidential campaigning has a major-party candidate so blithely shot such a tall and rigid […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY So the other day I was, for reasons unclear, daydreaming about a Mitt Romney inaugural parade that celebrates the forces stacked against what’s left of the middle-class — or as Mitt might call it, The Envious Class — full-blown flag-waving plutocratic fanfare for the uncommon man complete with flag bearers, floats and a marching band. Actually, it’s not all that imaginary. It’s pretty much already underway. To wit: The Flag Bearers: Here’s a trivia question the answer to which may be one of the most unconscionable statistics ever recorded: What is the amount of money […]

BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Mitt Romney’s appearance at Liberty University  was altogether astounding given the fact that applicants to the school must specifically reject the Mormon concept of God and acknowledge that the Book of Mormon is not divine revelation. Be that as it may, he took the present-company-accepted opportunity to genuflect his steadfast concurrence with the Christian “tradition” of marriage being between one man and one woman (he opposes civil unions and supports a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage as well)  and it got me to thinking about his own rather dubious religious heritage and the inescapable bit of hypocrisy that could easily attach thereto. Just in case you’re one of those who remain […]

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY The recent White House Correspondents “Laugh-In” reminded me of one past when Obama quipped about how young men with designs on Sasha or Malia could be met with Predator drones, and another when “dubya” pretended to search under and around the dais for WMDs. To me it was almost surreal (and, yeah, I’ll be criticized for this) conjuring up a picture of Adolf purportedly dancing a jig upon learning that France had been brought to its knees. So cute, and oh so unfitting. All three acts were so dispassionate and detached from the reality of […]

BY WILLIAM C. HENRY The political over-importance and consequent over-propagandizing attached to Hilary Rosen’s recent questioning of Ann Romney’s work record brings to mind a previous column I authored concerning birthright/inheritance and the hyper-critical role it plays in determining one’s economic future — and the fact that this whole child-rearing “choice” kerfuffle only serves to further emphasize the point. How so? you ask. Well, because today’s moms’ “choice” of child rearing methods is determined almost entirely by economic status rather than any altruism or feminism on their part, and is but another example of the overriding influence that something none of us had […]