PAPERBOY: Now With Less Extra, Read All About It!

BY AMY Z. QUINN Like time, news waits for no man. Keeping up with the funny papers has always been an all-day job, even in the pre-Internets era. These days, however, it’s a two-man job. That’s right — these days you need someone to do your reading for you, or risk falling hopelessly behind and, as a result, increasing your chances of dying lonely and somewhat bitter. Hey, we know how it is — so many words to read, so little time to surf for free porn. That’s why every week, PAPERBOY does your alt-weekly reading for you, freeing up […]

TODAY I SAW…

BY JEFF DEENEY “Today I saw…” is a series of nonfiction shorts based on my experiences as a caseworker serving formerly homeless families now living in North and West Philadelphia. I decided not long after starting the job that I was seeing so many fascinating and disturbing things in the city’s poorest neighborhoods that I needed to start cataloging them. I hope this bi-weekly column serves as a record of a side of the city that many Philadelphians don’t come in contact with on a daily basis. I want to capture moments not frequently covered by the local media, which […]

CINEMA: Death Kisses At The Drive-In

BY DAN BUSKIRK FILM CRITIC The filmmakers turn their cameras both inward and outward in yet another improbable triple-feature mounted by Andrew’s Video Vault. In Richard Rush’s The Stunt Man and the surprisingly plush Poverty Row programmer The Death Kiss treachery descends during a film’s shooting while the mid-seventies goofball comedy Drive-In gently satirizes the Texas townsfolk who meet up one night while watching movies in their cars under the stars. And you can call this a double triple-feature, each film has its own movie-within-the-movie. First up is the best remembered of the bunch; Richard Rush’s euphoric meditation on the […]

WAPO: CIA Chief Told Study Group Iraq ‘Irreversible’

Early on the morning of Nov. 13, 2006, members of the bipartisan Iraq Study Group gathered around a dark wooden conference table in the windowless Roosevelt Room of the White House. For more than an hour, they listened to President Bush give what one panel member called a “Churchillian” vision of “victory” in Iraq and defend the country’s prime minister, Nouri al-Maliki. “A constitutional order is emerging,” he said. Later that morning, around the same conference table, CIA Director Michael V. Hayden painted a starkly different picture for members of the study group. Hayden said “the inability of the government […]

LEAVE IT TO BEAVER: Miss NJ Goes Public With Pix

BY AMY Z. QUINN Ah, the old pumpkin-in-the-bra trick. That always kills. Cutting the legs out from under her still-anonymous blackmailer, Miss NJ Amy Polumbo took to the “Today” show to release the supposedly scandalous photos herself, hours before pageant officials were set to review her case and possibly strip her of her crown — but don’t look for that to happen, unless there are more, and dirtier, photos of Polumbo out there. Because right now, it sounds like the snapshots fall squarely under the “Two Dorks And a SixPack” category. (If you’re especially impatient, the first photo comes at […]

FLYERS MAKEOVER: Pretty In Pink?

Flyers fans desperate to eradicate the painful memories of last season and see nine new players who weren’t on the roster at midseason will have to wait until mid-October. That’s because the Flyers are headed to western Canada for a week when the 2007-08 season opens and won’t make their Wachovia Center debut until Oct. 13 against the New York Islanders, who could be the worst team in the Atlantic Division this season.The first chance fans here will get to see general manager Paul Holmgren’s remade cast in person — dressed in the team’s new, skin-tight Reebok sweaters (NOT pictured) […]

KILLADELPHIA: Where The Money Go At?

Ever since President Bush took office, there has been $2 billion worth of federal funding cuts to state and local law enforcement agencies. Wait a minute. PC assumed that the Bush administration was big on national security and making Americans feel safe at home. So what’s up with Washington pulling money away from first-responders? Aren’t these the same first-responders hailed during the 2004 election season, when it seemed that every other Republican stump speech was tied to 9-11? Then we read this from the NYT: Many criminologists and law enforcement officials are debating whether the violent-crime data signal a significant […]

PERVY: Lehigh U. Vice-Provost Busted In Pedo Sting

Steven J. Devlin, 49, a vice provost at Lehigh University, was arraigned yesterday and charged with criminal attempt to commit rape and related offenses, authorities said. He was incarcerated for several hours at the George W. Hill Correctional Center before posting 10 percent of his $250,000 bail late yesterday afternoon, according to prison records. “Lehigh University has placed Devlin on administrative leave and is cooperating fully with law enforcement,” the university said in a statement. Authorities said Devlin, who used the screen name Phillyguy5, began an AOL relationship in May with a female county detective posing as a 32-year-old woman […]

Disgraced GOP Senator Urged Clinton Impeachment

LET YOUR FINGERS DO THE WALKING: Senator David Vitter (R-LA) demonstrating his ‘drop it like it’s hot’ move. BY JONATHAN VALANIA Insisting the President no longer had the “moral fitness” to lead the country, David Vitter, then a firebrand redmeat conservative state senator from Louisiana, urged Congress to impeach William Jefferson Clinton over the Lewinsky affair in an October 29, 1998 opinion piece for the New Orleans Times-Picayune: Some current polls may suggest that people are turned off by the whole Clinton mess and don’t care — because the stock market is good, the Clinton spin machine is even better […]

FIREFIGHTERS: The 9/11 Emperor Has No Clothes

FORBES: Relatives of firefighters killed at the World Trade Center in 2001 reproached Republican presidential hopeful Rudy Giuliani in a video Wednesday, pairing footage of the falling twin towers with charges that the city’s former mayor was woefully unprepared for Sept. 11, causing needless firefighter deaths. The parents and siblings of some of the 343 firefighters killed in the terrorist attacks released the video with the International Association of Fire Fighters, which opposes Giuliani’s candidacy.

GAYBO ALERT: DJ Lady Miss Kier

Yup, Lady Miss Kier of Deee-Lite fame steps it up to DJ the opening night festivities of the 13th Annual Gay & Lesbian Film Festival on Thursday. Here’s info from the press release — hope to see you there!! xo, Tommy Zane The 13th Philadelphia International Gay & Lesbian Film Festival gets underway with a sensational screening of A Four Letter Word, a romantic comedy, at The Prince Music Theater followed by an in-person Q&A with featured cast and crew including director Casper Andreas (Slutty Summer) and star Charlie David (“Dante’s Cove”). Then, grab your spot on the bus (one-way […]