COMMENTARY: The GOP’s Theater Of Cruelty

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY One could write a library on the subject of Republican dastardliness — the stock-in-trade of a bunch of tiny-minded, antebellum, bible-babbling, Stone Agers who represent the intolerance, selfishness and sanctimony of an American lineage that has refused to “integrate” itself into a civilized union ever since the stars and bars were raised over Montgomery — but I’ll spare you much of the agony. My plan is to merely “uncomfort” you a bit by highlighting a few of the more acridly odious activities radiating from the Right-Wing latrine. First and certainly foremost (in as much as it […]

KOCH SUCKER: Q&A With The Man Who Punked The Governor Of Wisconsin & The Koch Brothers

  EDITOR’S NOTE: To mark the inauspicious occasion of Wisconsin governor/Koch Brothers puppet Scott Walker declaring his candidacy yesterday, we dipped into our archives to bring the encore edition of our 2011 interview with then-Buffalo Beast editor Ian Murphy, the man who successfully punk’d Walker by calling up his office and pretending to be Tea Party sugar daddy David Koch. The complete audio recording is posted below. This Q&A first posted on March 31st, 2011. BY JONATHAN VALANIA When Buffalo Beast editor Ian Murphy called up the governor of Wisconsin late last month pretending to be David Koch — AKA […]

REWIND: John Oliver Watch

Good Ol’ Johnny Boy, without you I would have to suffer through the second season of True Detectives. I wouldn’t wish that on Justin Bieber, and there isn’t much I wouldn’t wish on Justin Bieber. For all of the common folk out there, yes you, the individual not suckling at the teet of HBO, I will breakdown the major issue John Oliver tackles, as he most commonly does, in his sprightly, rosey posey-cheeked, British manner. This week? Stadiums. Now before the masses of cheese steak-chomping, gold chain-slinging, beer-smuggling 700 Level fight clubbers that Philadelphia has (in)bred for going on countless […]

EDITORIAL: The Revolving Outhouse Door Of D.C.

BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Remember Gary Hart? How ’bout Donna Rice? I reckon if you were of voting age back in ’87, you probably do. If not, here’s a quick refresher. Gary was a married, really smart, good-looking, charismatic, two-term U.S. Senator from Colorado and making his second run at the Democrat Party’s Presidential nomination. Donna was a young, really, really smart (Magna Cum Laude/Phi Beta Kappa grad of the University of South Carolina), and really, really good-looking (Miss South Carolina). Well, as fate would have it and what with one thing leading to another and what with the media […]

COMMENTARY: Ann Coulter She-Wolf Of The SS

BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Recently I’ve been adding a “comment” or two to some of Ann Coulter’s bigoted articles (does she write any other kind?). I admit to it being a rather nonsensical exercise in as much as nearly all of the “replies” I get are insultingly lame retorts from one or more of her cretinous sycophants all of whom exhibit significantly less cranial content than Coulter’s, which, in and of itself, can hardly be considered of rocket scientist dimensions. But I digress. It’s interesting to note how with all accomplished bigots — Coulter, Limbaugh and Hannity are classic examples […]

COMMENT: Never Drop Your Gun To Hug A Grizzly

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY So there I was in the waiting room waiting to be called for my MRI and I happened to pick up a copy of American Rifleman to pass the time. I’d been thinking about purchasing a small handgun off and on for some time and thought I’d bone up on available options. Now, for me to be seen reading AR is a wee bit like Robert Reich getting caught with a copy of Barry Goldwater’s Conscience of a Conservative on his nightstand. Anyway, leafing through it I was mildly surprised to come across not just […]

COMMENTARY: Once Upon A Time In America

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY What now seems like forever ago on a flood-lit Chicago stage in front of a world-wide audience of hundreds of millions of adoring soon-to-be constituents, a relatively young, bright, optimistic, ostensibly eager-to-act-upon-a-promised-forward-thinking-agenda black President-elect lifted the hopes and dreams of young, old and in between, black, white and tan, liberals and progressives, idealists and dreamers, the down-trodden and the forgotten, Untold legions cheered and wept with joy. And then … well … a number of unexpected and not so funny things happened on the way to the end of the next eight years. If you considered yourself […]

MATS WEEK: When The Sh*t Hits The Fans

EDITOR’S NOTE: In honor of the re-activated Replacements playing the Festival Pier on Saturday, we’re re-running Mats Week. Look for Replacements lore and legend all week on a Phawker near you! On September 5, 1981, the Replacements played a 25-song set at the Minneapolis club called the 7th Street Entry, opening for Husker Du as part of a Twin/Tone Records showcase that was recorded and videotaped. (You can watch them HERE) This show took place just a couple weeks after the Replacements released their first album, Sorry Ma Forgot to Take Out the Trash. That was back when they were […]

THE BEST JUSTICE MONEY CAN’T BUY: Q&A w/ William Ciancaglini Esq., Candidate For Judge

  BY JONATHAN VALANIA Attorney William Ciancaglini, aka Billy C., thinks the pay-to-play method of electing judges in this city stinks on ice. He should know, he’s an underdog candidate for Common Pleas judge. The source of that stink, he says, is the funny money you have to pay into the Dem Machine to become a judge in this city. That’s right, seats on the bench don’t go to the most qualified, they go to the highest bidder. Just to get into the game will cost you $35K, money Ciancaglini doesn’t have. Even though he’s a trial lawyer, Ciancaglini considers […]

COMMENTARY: Vive La Rapprochement!

BY WILLIAM C. HENRY After decades of steady and evermore forceful insertion, America’s resident Cuban expats and their uber-pandering Washington politicos may finally be forced to begin extracting their middle digits from between the cheeks of the 11 million-plus Cuban citizens they’ve been long-distance sodomizing for the past thirty years. And how only-slightly-better-late-than-never it is that a black lame-duck Democrat President would be the one willing to turn away from all the vote-pandering and do for the Cuban people what more than 2 million of their oh-so-more-economically-pampered and politically catered-to stateside countrymen haven’t had the magnanimity, let alone the compassion or plain old […]

COMMENTARY: In Disparity We Trust

  BY WILLIAM C. HENRY Guess what country you’re in: 20% of income goes to the top 1%; nearly 50% of income growth goes to the top 1%. Here’s a hint: 0.1% of the population control as much wealth as the poorest 90%. I know, you had it figured it out before you got to the semicolon. So, let me ask you this, did these little factoids at least raise an eyebrow? I admit that they may not have shocked me, but they damn sure stirred my undivided attention. As a matter of fact, I’m thinking their disclosure ought to […]

COMMENTARY: Blood And Treasure

Artwork by SHEPARD FAIREY BY WILLIAM C. HENRY “I pledge allegiance to the arms manufacturers of the United States of America and to the stratocracy for which we yearn.” Ring any bells? It should. As I speak, Republican members of Congress are fighting tooth and nail among themselves to see how much money they can ADD to the $850+ BILLION we already spend every year on the military. So, in the midst of all this right-wing-middle-fingers-up-the-asses-of-America’s-unimaginably-dire-social-and-infrastructure-urgencies, I’m hoping you’ll agree that it might at least be prescient to expose where America currently stands in relation to the world’s other developed nations vis-à-vis unconscionable military overload. […]

FRANKLY SPEAKING: Q&A With Barney Frank

Artwork by DONKEY HOTEY BY CHRIS MCCARY Barney Frank grew up around a Jersey City truck stop, went to Harvard, and in 1981 became the first openly gay U.S. Congressmen. During his 30 year tenure in that absurd and corrupt institution Frank has been one of the loudest voices for liberal and progressive causes. In 2013, he retired from Congress and is currently working the lucrative speaker circuit. Frank will be reading from his just-published memoir FRANK: A Life In Politics From The Great Society To Same-Sex Marriage tonight at the Free Library. Last week we got the former Congressman […]