BY MIKE WOLVERTON SPORTS GUY An as-it-happened account of NLDS Game 2: Top of the 1st: Kyle Kendrick on the hill. The rook has been money for the Phillies this year, winning 10 games after a June callup. Home Run, Tulowitzki. OK, it only one run. Home Run, Holliday. Oh shit. Is this whole season gonna finish up with an obscure late Saturday night loss in Denver? (notice the immediate flip-flop from optimism to doomsaying) Bottom of the 1st: The Phils really need something to feel good about, at least a run in this inning to show they wont roll […]
PAPERBOY: Spooky Edgar Allan YO! Edition
BY AMY Z. QUINN Like time, news waits for no man. Keeping up with the funny papers has always been an all-day job, even in the pre-Internets era. These days, however, it’s a two-man job. That’s right — these days you need someone to do your reading for you, or risk falling hopelessly behind and, as a result, increasing your chances of dying lonely and somewhat bitter. Hey, we know how it is — so many words to read, so little time to surf for free porn. That’s why every week, PAPERBOY does your alt-weekly reading for you, freeing up […]
KILLADELPHIA: 2 More Dead Since U Went 2 Work
BLOOMBERG NEWS: Oct. 4 PHILADELPHIA — Two guards for Securitas AB’s Loomis cash-handling unit were killed during the robbery of an armored car this morning in the northeastern part of Philadelphia, police said. The robbery happened at about 8 a.m. local time in the parking lot of a Wachovia Bank branch near Bustleton and Bleigh avenues in the city’s Rhawnhurst section, Officer Tanya Little said in a telephone interview. MORE INQUIRER: An intensive manhunt is underway in the Northeast for a lone gunman who shot dead two Loomis armored-truck guards and wounded another in a robbery attempt. The men who […]
BEWARE: Taxi Charging Outrageous Fares At Gunpoint
INQUIRER: Four people who hailed cabs in the early-morning hours last month were taken on a wild ride at gunpoint when the hack and his accomplice turned out to be armed robbers, police said yesterday. They warned city riders to beware, especially if there is a passenger up front with the cab driver. All the victims were college-aged. Central Detectives Lt. Richard Brown said it appears the robbers are using a real cab that had been put out of service. It is described as a black Ford Crown Victoria with a white logo. Victims, including one from the University of […]
We Know It’s Only Rock N’ Roll But We Like It
A QUIET NIGHT IN WITH: The Mekons, World Cafe Live, Tuesday Night BY JONATHAN VALANIA FOR THE INQUIRER If you ever crunched the numbers on rock stardom, you would ask yourself why anyone bothers trying. Sure, there will always be that one-in-a-million talent that, whether through luck or lightning caught in a bottle, will shoot human cannonball-style into the rarefied heights of immortality. But for most it is a life of minor-key daily indignity, a soft but uninterrupted hell of winnowing expectations and diminished returns that will bring them all the fame of philatelist and all the riches of a […]
MONICA: Red Meat For Rotting Vegetables
BY MONICA YANT KINNEY INQUIRER COLUMNIST Dios mio, I’m thinking as Rudy Giuliani graces Geno’s Steaks with his presence the other night.So many young, white college kids hoping the GOP presidential front-runner might accidentally touch them as he moved among the masses. So many Republicans united by disgust over the changing face of America, they don’t notice the enemy playing futbol on a rec center field across the street. As campaign cliches go, it doesn’t get much better than Giuliani dropping by Joey Vento‘s neon palace in South Philly. The Italian American who wants to seal the border, bonding with […]
YA GOTTA BELIEVE: In This Town, The Ring Of Sweat Inside The Blue Collar Is Always Tinted Phillies Red
BY JAMES DOOLITTLE I swear that at some point yesterday, I sped past a news article that made mention of a Pat Burrell sighting at Five Guys Burgers over on Chestnut Street following Monday’s Phillies rally at Dilworth Plaza. For the record, I can’t put my finger on this news brief, although I will say it was full of non-specifics and only contained two purported facts — that Pat The Bat was eating a burger, and he was eating it alone. I spent a good part of last night questioning whether I could have hallucinated this item, or whether […]
TODAY I SAW . . .
BY JEFF DEENEY TODAY I SAW a psychotic man harassing the African vendors who hawk oils and knock-off handbags on Market Street outside the Forman Mills on 49th. The psychotic’s beard was thick and matted, his clothes filthy, and the bulky leather jacket he wore over a thick hooded sweatshirt was too heavy for a warm fall afternoon. It looked like he hadn’t changed clothes since last winter. His ranting was incoherent; he wasn’t stringing full sentences together, his yelling hopped from topic to topic. His anger was unfocused but his gestures pointed in the general direction of a younger […]
TONIGHT: Destroy Your Safe And Happy Lives…
Before it is too late! Mekons, tonight, World Cafe Live! [painting by JOHN LANGFORD]
AUTHOR, AUTHOR: 13 Things You Are Not Supposed To Know About Daniel Handler, AKA Lemony Snicket
1. Mr. Handler is answering these questions while sipping his second Blanton’s in his posh room at the Four Seasons. 2. Mr. Handler plays accordion on the new Magnetic Fields album, Distortion, due out in January. He will be touring with the band on the West Coast. 3. Mr. Handler only bothered to learn to play the accordion so he could pick up chicks. “When I was coming up it was during that brief time in rock history when no keyboard whatsoever was cool, and that’s the only instrument I played. I really, really wanted to be in a band, […]
INSTA-REVIEW: 5 Things You Should Know About Van Halen At The Wachovia Center Last Night
1. Wolfgang Van Halen (who’s replaced the recently shitcanned Michael Anthony), it must be said, could use a little of mom’s Jenny Craig action. But hell, he’s only 16 so we’ll call it baby fat. Decent enough bass player, but really, who even knew Van Halen had a bass player anyway? 2. Say goodbye to Diamond Dave, say hello to Gold Brocade Dave. Simon LeBon‘s closet is short a jacket. 3. Alex Van Halen: Still rocking the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles headband. Ya gotta give the guy props for sticking by his guns. For some the Flashdance look was passing […]
PHILLY MAG: Why Ask WHYY? Here’s Why…
BY STEVE VOLK PHILADELPHIA MAGAZINE STAFF WRITER Marty Moss-Coane hadn’t planned on saying anything, but the longer she listened, the more it seemed that a particularly significant issue just wasn’t being raised. The occasion was a company-wide meeting in the summer of 2006 to discuss morale at WHYY, and the longtime host of the popular call-in show Radio Times felt she had some idea what was making her co-workers angry. So she finally stood up, both literally and figuratively the heft of her role at the station allowing her to say something to CEO Bill Marrazzo that maybe no one […]
All Of This Happened While You Were Sleeping
MESSAGE TO YOU, RUDY: Guiliani outside the House That Joey Vento Built, 8:30ish RELATED: Joey Vento In Bed With Southern Agents Of Intolerance, Oh My! RUDY GOES TO JOEY’S: Click For Slideshow [photos by JONATHAN VALANIA]