Pond — the circa now Australian psych-pranksters whose memberships Veng Diagrams with Tame Impala, NOT the early 90s Portlandian Sub Pop grunge-titan-shoulda-beens, although there is some haircut similarities — raises more questions than it ever answers. Chief among those questions is not ‘Are these guys high?’ instead it’s ‘How goddamn high are these people?’ ‘Is that even safe?’ ‘Should we tell someone?’ and lastly, ‘What about all the chromosonal damage?’ The answer to these questions in order of appearance: Higher than an entire Phish concert parking lotful of nitrous balloon huffers, fuck no, don’t bother everyone already knows, and the myth that LSD causes chromosome damage was long ago debunked — the fact is EVERYTHING CAUSES CHROMOSOME DAMAGE. So, in the immortal words of the philosopher-king known as Nike, just do it. In fact, we’re gonna help. We have a pair of tickets to see Pond and the wonderfully named Machete Western at Underground Arts tomorrow night. To qualify to win you must do the following: A) Friend us on Facebook B) follow us on Twitter C) send an email to PHAWKER66@GMAIL.COM telling us you have done so, or already do, along with your full name and a mobile number for confirmation. Put the magic words BEARD, WIVES, DENIM in the subject line. Good luck and godspeed!