NEWS CLUES: It’s Like Adderall For Your Eyeballs

RICH MAN’S ASSPANTS: BRANSON LITERALLY HOISTS SELF BY HIS OWN PETARD

branson.jpgThe billionaire entrepreneur and serial self-publicist had decided to descend 407ft from the top of the Palms Casino Hotel, Las Vegas, to promote Virgin America, a new airline offering domestic flights in the U.S. It all started so well. Strapped in a harness and attached to a cable, the 57-year-old tycoon beamed confidently before taking a running jump from the roof. As he descended rapidly, he pulled airline tickets out of his pocket and scattered them to the ground as part of the bungee-cum-abseiling stunt. But instead of gliding smoothly to the ground, Sir Richard smashed his bottom twice into the building and, as the colour drained from his face, began to realise something was amiss – or rather, missing. After clamping his hands to his seatless trousers to assess the damage, he was lowered to the ground without further injury. Looking white as a sheet, he did not stop to answer questions and was whisked into the building by his entourage. [via THE DAILY MAIL]

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KILLABURBIA: BEWARE OF HEAVILY-ARMED & BULLIED KIDS & PRESS-HUNGRY DAs

student_weapons_da_300.jpgIt wasn’t a typical 14-year-old’s bedroom. There were three homemade grenades packed with black powder and BBs. There were 30 air-powered guns, modeled to look like real weapons. And there was a genuine 9mm weapon. Their owner was alleged to be a troubled teen who had been bullied so much by other students that he had been home-schooled for the last 18 months, officials said. “He may have believed that the world would be a better place without the bullies in it,” Montgomery County District Attorney Bruce Castor said Thursday after the teenager was taken into custody and accused of planning a “Columbine-type” assault on Plymouth Whitemarsh High School. The teenager had no bullets for the weapon, and Castor said there was no evidence that an attack was imminent, but, nevertheless, fear gripped the high school after parents and students learned of the possible plot between 9:45 a.m. Thursday, when the school sent out 4,700 automated messages, and 10:45, when teachers made an announcement. [via the INQUIRER]

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 SISTER MORPHINE MEET RUBY TUESDAY: MARIANNE FAITHFUL REVEALS HEP C

mariannefaithful.jpgMarianne Faithfull has revealed she suffers from hepatitis C. Miss Faithfull, 60, made the revelation while discussing her battle with breast cancer, from which she was recently given the all-clear. Hepatitis C is contracted either through a contaminated blood transfusion or by sharing hypodermic needles. There is no vaccine or standard treatment for the condition, which can cause liver damage, cirrhosis and even liver cancer. Miss Faithfull, a former drug addict, did not say whether she had picked up the virus during her heroin habit in the 1970s or subsequently. She told Philip Schofield on ITV’s This Morning: “I have hepatitis C and the worst thing for that is alcohol. I do not miss the drugs. I suppose it would be nice to have a glass of wine or something but it really would not be good for my health.” [via THE DAILY MAIL]

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