BY AMY Z. QUINN Straight from the City Paper to Phillywood, Duane Swierczyinski tells me his novel The Blonde may be headed for the big screen. Actress Michelle Monaghan has optioned the rights to film the 2006 sci-fi thrilla, and we could easily see her playing the titular badass babe with a killer kiss. Though who plays Jack Eisley, the bitterly almost-divorced journalist? And will we find out through on-location shooting where that effed-up masturbation club really is? Here’s the official announcement: Film rights to Duane Swierczynski’s THE BLONDE, about a soon-to-be-divorced young father who is poisoned by a beautiful […]
WHEN PIGS FLY: Auditors Downsize Inky Circulation
ASSOCIATED PRESS: The Philadelphia Inquirer’s circulation numbers have been reduced after an adjustment by industry auditors. The Audit Bureau of Circulations cut the Inquirer’s posted Sunday circulation by 15,718 to 670,022 for the 12 months ended April 1, 2007. The weekday circulation count was adjusted down by 392 to 341,384. The change enlarges the Inquirer’s Sunday circulation decline from the March 2006 audited report to 5.7 percent, instead of the previous 3.4 percent decline. The weekday circulation decline for the 12 months remained at about 3.6 percent. The 15,718 reduction is unusually large in the newspaper industry, which typically sees […]
CRITICAL: Fumo Hospitalized After Heart Attack
INQUIRER: State Sen. Vincent J. Fumo (D., Phila.) suffered a heart attack Sunday night, his spokesman Gary Tuma said.Fumo was eating dinner at his Spring Garden home at around 7 p.m. when he began experiencing chest pains and shortness of breath. He traveled by ambulance to Hahnemann University Hospital, where doctors determined he was suffering a heart attack … DEVELOPING … UPDATE: The senator was taken by ambulance to Hahnemann University Hospital, where doctors said he had a myocardial infarction and a blocked right coronary artery. Doctors did an emergency angioplasty and inserted a metal stent to restore normal blood […]
PAPERBOY: ‘Beer & Sports’ Edition
BY AMY Z. QUINN Like time, news waits for no man. Keeping up with the funny papers has always been an all-day job, even in the pre-Internets era. These days, however, it’s a two-man job. That’s right, these days you need someone to do your reading for you, or risk falling hopelessly behind and, as a result, increasing your chances of dying lonely and somewhat bitter. That’s why every week, PAPERBOY does your alt-weekly reading for you. We pore over those time-consuming cover stories and give you the takeaway, suss out the cover art, warn you off the ink-wasters and […]
TODAY I SAW: Dawg Day Afternoon
BY JEFF DEENEY TODAY I SAW a collarless gray brindled pit bull giving lazy chase to another stray on 72nd Street, across from the Paschall Homes. The shaggy dog leading the pit bull jogged past the crumbling houses on Yocum Street, looking back over its shoulder, causing the pit to playfully hop up on his hind legs for a step or two when it did. The proliferation of feral dogs around the Paschall Homes lends irony to the statement spray painted on the facing low-rise brick wall dotted by plywood-covered windows on Greenway Avenue that reads, “Welcome 2 the Zoo.” […]
STUPID BLOG WARS: The Trouble With Sweeney
Since we find other people’s feuds with Doctor Philebrity to be almost as tiresome and tedious as our own, we got bored and changed the channel about half way through this exhaustive summation of the Clockcleaner vs. Joey Sweeney cage match. But you people on the Internets LOVE this catty shit, so here’s yer bowl of milk. Lap it up. Apparently there is talk of a lawsuit and the whole Internet getting sued or something — it’s like 2006 just threw up all over itself. Wake us up when it’s over.
BEACH HOUSE: Heart Of Chambers
From Baltimore, yo. Comin’ to the Barbary April 3rd. Nice.
LIVE REVIEW: Let Us Now Praise Bill Cosby
BY DAVE WALK Bill Cosby is 70-years-old now and its been 45 years since his debut comedy album. And even though he may be known to some for wearing his trademark sweaters on The Cosby Show, the pudding pops or, more recently, for his critical remarks towards African American families, he is, above all things, a stand-up comedian. And he’s still performing live. This past Sunday the 24th, he was at the State Theatre in New Brunswick, New Jersey and he did two shows, three and seven.There’s a scene in 2002’s documentary Comedian, about Jerry Seinfeld’s re-entrance into the world […]
Top 5 Reasons Why St. Vincent Was Hotter Than Whatever Indie-Chick Show U Went 2 Last Night
SAINTS BE PRAISED: St. Vincent, First Unitarian, Last Night [CLICK TO ENLARGE] 1. St. Vincent sounds even better live than on record. Highlights of the evening were the opener, “Now, Now,” and “Marry Me,” the latter leaping to the top of the list of most heart-wrenching songs I’ve ever seen live on stage. 2. St. Vincent was very happy to finally be in Philadelphia for the tail end of her two-week tour, telling the crowd that she had drove through “the mountains, the desert, the ocean, the Siberia, and Seattle” to make it. Personally, I am of the opinion that […]
QUESTION THE PARKING AUTHORITY: Inky Finds PPA Worker Comp Claims Are Astonishingly High
INQUIRER: Battling fires and fighting crime is risky work, to be sure, but those jobs have nothing on writing parking tickets. Or so it would seem, if workers’ compensation claims are any indication. Over the last four years, employees at the Philadelphia Parking Authority have reported being hurt on the job more than twice as often as city firefighters or police officers. As a result, the Parking Authority spends far more on settling workplace-injury claims: $1,558 per employee, compared with the firefighters’ average of $1,084 and the Police Department figure of $833, according to an Inquirer analysis of city and […]
THIS JUST IN: Terry Gross On The Simpsons
This Sunday! Check local listings…
KILLADELPHIA: One More Dead Since U Went To Bed
INQUIRER: The body of a man was found in a car in West Oak Lane last night, police said. About 9:20 p.m., police discovered Steeve Charles, 24, behind the driver’s seat of a Nissan Maxima near his residence in the 7500 block of Thouron Street. He had been shot at least twice, and was pronounced dead at the scene shortly before 10 p.m. Police are investigating to determine suspects and motives.