In ancient Rome, at night, when they were drunk and high, and feeling poorly about themselves, they used to toss bread in the alleys and shoot the rats with machines guns as they scrambled for the crumbs. And then they would feel better about themselves. That, as much as anything else, explains why Rome burned. Today, we shoot them with TV cameras and it makes us here at Phawker Industries feel very Roman. So much so that we burn every time Jim Gardner fiddles. [Hat tip to The Wook]
ASK MOTHER PHAWKER: The Importance of Wearing Clean Underwear To EVERY Book Club Meeting, Not Just Some
Dear Mother Phawker: My wife is a member of a book club whose members meet once a month, rotating from one house to the next. Two weeks ago, my wife was the host, and I watched as our living room filled with about 10 women. I played a support role in the proceedings, keeping the refreshments flowing and the food bowls filled. Everything was fine until I bumped into one of the club members in the hall. We’ve been friends for several years, and she’s always been welcome in our home — maybe too welcome. She smiled at me and […]
QUESTION: When Is A Serial Killer NOT A Serial Killer? ANSWER: When The Victims Are Sex Workers And BILLIONS of Casino Tourist Dollars Are At Stake
ATLANTIC CITY – Identifying the four women whose decomposing bodies were found facedown in a ditch behind a strip of seedy West Atlantic City motels last week had been the most pressing task for investigators. Now police face the daunting task of finding their killer. Yesterday, authorities identified the fourth victim – the youngest – as Molly Jean Dilts, 20, an unemployed fast-food cook from Blairsville in Western Pennsylvania. She last spoke to relatives on Oct. 7, after going to Atlantic City with her boyfriend. Sometime after that, her family filed a missing persons report with police, authorities said. “She […]
STOP THE PRESSES: And Fire Up The Internets, There’s A New Paper In Town And You Can’t Read It On The Can
From Sgt. Byko’s Lips To Our Ears: Guild And The Company are in FINAL bargaining meeting, could last an hour, could last 48 hours, but if THE STRIKE comes: Philadelphia Inquirer, Daily News staffers to launch competing online paper if workers strike By Associated Press Wednesday, November 29, 2006 – Updated: 08:14 AM EST PHILADELPHIA – The largest union at Philadelphia’s two biggest daily newspapers is planning to launch\ an online newspaper to compete with the company Web site if workers go on strike after midnight on Thursday. Employees from The Philadelphia Inquirer and Philadelphia Daily News would contribute local […]
The Resurrection Of GREGG FOREMAN?
FROM PITCHFORK: Chan Marshall has recruited Dirty Three’s Jim White, the Jon Spencer Blues Explosion’s Judah Bauer, the Delta 72’s Gregg Foreman, and Lizard Music’s Erik Paparozzi to accompany her on the rest of her tour dates this year, under the appropriate band name of “Dirty Delta Blues”. Four of those dates feature White and Bauer as the opening act and two will be in California for New Year’s celebrations with Gnarls Barkley and the Flaming Lips. PREVIOUSLY: Heroin Is Cool WILL Fuck Your Shit Up [PW]
This Is NOT The New Illumina Video
This IS: BUILD YOUR OWN by Illumina (Appearing Friday At Johnny Brendas)
SPORTZ: Eagles Suck, Blah, Blah, Blah…PAT BERKERY PLEASE PHONE HOME…Eagles Suck, Blah, Blah…
Don’t know if you’ve noticed but our vaunted sports columnist Patrick “PBR” Berkery has been MIA for weeks now. Actually, he’s out on tour with the Pernice Brothers. When he told us he was leaving for a while we were like ‘What kind of sports columnist goes on tour with some pussy indie-pop band in the middle of football season?’ And he was all like ‘I’m a drummer, not a sportscaster.’ And we’re like NO YOU’RE NOT, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? YOU ARE DEAD TO ME! DEAD! And, um, give us a call when you get back and we’ll […]
It Was 50 Years Ago Today, Allen Ginsberg Taught The Sheep To Stray, He’s Been Going In And Out Of Style But He’s Guaranteed To Raise A SMILE
THE BEAT PAGE: Howl CITY LIGHTS: 50 Years Ago They Wanted To Send Bookstore Owners To Jail On Obscenity Charges For Selling A Book We Now Celebrate On Public Radio, It’s Called Progress RADIO TIMES: We celebrate the 50th anniversary of Allen Ginsberg’s poem “Howl.” We talk with ANNE WALDMAN, a friend and colleague of Allen Ginsberg and JASON SHINDER editor of “The Poem That Changed America: ‘Howl’ Fifty Years Later.”
Mom, Dad, Ladies And Gentlemen Of the Jury, We Give You 174 Newspaper Stories That All Start With The Words BROTHER OF PHILADELPHIA MAYOR INDICTED, You Must Be So Proud
Philadelphia mayor’s brother indicted PHILADELPHIA, Nov. 28 (UPI) — Philadelphia Mayor John Street’s brother has been charged with fraud and tax evasion for allegedly selling his presumed influence to an airport contractor. Milton Street and two employees of Philadelphia Airport Services were charged in a lengthy federal indictment. The company was a joint venture formed to bid on a maintenance contract at Philadelphia International Airport and Northeast Philadelphia Airport. U.S. Attorney Patrick Meehan said that the company hired Street in 2002, paying him $30,000 a month, because executives believed he would help the company keep its contract, NBC10 reported. “Milton […]
Now Playing On PHAWKER RADIO: How I Learned To STOP WORRYING About Chaos And LOVE Free Jazz
BY DAN BUSKIRK “I hope I never like this stuff,” I remember thinking as a 15-year-old, tuning past Philly’s jazz station, WRTI. Jazz was too unmelodic, too cerebral and too unsexy to my revved-up, hormone-addled mind, sentiments similar to what I still hear from many adult music lovers. For me, it was only a few years later that I finally found myself deep into jazz, after making my way up the time line from the big bands (the AM radio in my first car was set to the old timers’ station, WPEN), to Sinatra, to Chet Baker to Miles and […]
Cheap Laffs: THAT’S NOT FUNNY, IT’S SCHTICK
Comedy By Non-Comedians Night Is TONIGHT, Man, Where DOES The Time Go? One Laris Kreslins is the brains behind this operation and this followup show to the premier back in ’01 (Pete’s Candy Store in Brooklyn) is sure to delight. Hosted by Rose Luardo (Sweatheart), local luminary non-comedians will perform 3-5 minute bits they think might be “funny” to an audience ready to laugh at about anything. Or that’s the plan anyway. This is perfect for anyone relishing uncomfortable pauses and the embarrassment of others. What’s the word? Schadenfreude… Yea, that’s it. Don’t miss it. Featuring funny people: Sam Schwartz, […]
DREAMY: ‘Harriet Brown’ At The Pearly Gates
FULL DISCLOSURE: This is was our band. Now it’s your life.
BANANA REPUBLIC: Appointed But Not ELECTED City Council Replacements Sworn In, Vow To Maintain Government Of THE MACHINE, By THE MACHINE And For THE MACHINE
Carol Campbell [PICTURED], Philadelphia’s newest councilwoman, sat with a benevolent smile on her face, ringed by a crush of supporters paying their respects. Stacked four deep, they plied her with kisses that left her cheeks stained with lipstick, and whispered words of congratulations into her ear. “Wait ’til you get a load of her,” said U.S. Rep. Bob Brady (D., Pa.) as he introduced the new Fourth District representative and fellow freshman Council members William Greenlee and Daniel Savage at a City Hall swearing-in session yesterday afternoon. Philadelphia’s political class, led by Brady, used the occasion to celebrate the virtues […]