[Artwork by AYE JAY!]
Gregg Turkington, AKA Neil Hamburger, is not a terrible comedian, he just plays one on stage and screen. With more than a dozen albums and EPs stretching back to the mid-90s, Turkington has put a lot of time and effort into maintaining his status as The Least Funny Man In America, Possibly The World. Consider his 2010 performance at The Reading Music Festival in the UK:
His entire set was booed and derided by the capacity crowd, with chants of “You’re shit and you know you are!”. As the set progressed bottles and other projectiles were hurled at Hamburger, before he completed his set. The stage’s host, Andrew O’Neill came on after the set, simply asking “Didn’t you all enjoy hating that?
Pfft, fucking limeys. What do they know about funny? If they’re so smart how come they work for us instead of the other way around? Huh? Anyway, The Hamburglar, as we’ve been calling him for, well, pretty much since the first part of this sentence (but it feels like it’s gonna stick) is performing at JBs tomorrow night in support of his new album Incident in Cambridge, Mass. We have a pair of tickets to give away to the first lucky Phawker reader to email us at FEED@PHAWKER.COM and tell us who Tony Clifton is. Put HAMBURGLAR in the subject line. Include a mobile number for confirmation. Good luck and godspeed.