Artwork by BANKSY
Dear Taliban,
I’ve have never had much patience for charlatans, sociopaths and fascists — or any combination thereof — that hide their perversions of justice behind the skirts of organized religion and false pieties. But you guys have raised the bar of that kind of douchebaggery to a whole new level. No kite flying, no music, no movies, no television, no computers, no satellite dishes, no chess boards, no dancing or clapping during sports events, no artistic representations of living things — no paintings, drawings, photographs, stuffed animals, or dolls. Basically no anything invented after the eighth century. I could probably fill up the whole Internet cataloging your brutal assaults on progress, reason, tolerance, human rights and common decency but in the interest of brevity, I will stick with what are arguably your five greatest outrages.1. Blasting The Buddhas Of Bamiyan To Smithereens
Carved into the side of a cliff some 1,500 years ago, the spectacular Buddhas Of Bamiyan were the largest standing Buddha sculptures in the world until you guys dynamited them in 2001. Those statues endured 14 centuries of civilization, but didn’t last five years under the Taliban. You guys are like a cultural Ebola Virus.
2. Your Little Slumber Party With Osama Bin Laden
Don’t think this really needs further comment, aside from ‘how’s that workin’ out for ya?’ Don’t know how closely you’re following the election but John Kerry had a great zinger: Ask Osama bin Laden if he’s better off now than he was four years ago.
3. Cutting Off The Ears And Nose Of Disobedient Teen Brides
From TIME:
The Taliban pounded on the door just before midnight, demanding that Aisha, 18, be punished for running away from her husband’s house. They dragged her to a mountain clearing near her village in the southern Afghan province of Uruzgan, ignoring her protests that her in-laws had been abusive, that she had no choice but to escape. Shivering in the cold air and blinded by the flashlights trained on her by her husband’s family, she faced her spouse and accuser. Her in-laws treated her like a slave, Aisha pleaded. They beat her. If she hadn’t run away, she would have died. Her judge, a local Taliban commander, was unmoved. Later, he would tell Aisha’s uncle that she had to be made an example of lest other girls in the village try to do the same thing. The commander gave his verdict, and men moved in to deliver the punishment. Aisha’s brother-in-law held her down while her husband pulled out a knife. First he sliced off her ears. Then he started on her nose. Aisha passed out from the pain but awoke soon after, choking on her own blood. The men had left her on the mountainside to die. MORE
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