WORTH REPEATING: The Greatest Obit Ever Told

LEGACY.COM: A short stint with the Spokane City garbage collection squad was followed by a similarly-short hitch, ‘cold-canvassing’ for one of Spokane’s leading predatory roofing and siding contractors. That invaluable vocational experience was followed by six years employment at an industrial transformer manufacturing plant – which failed to lead to tenure, as the company moved its facility to North Carolina to take advantage of a lower-wage environment. In late 1980, Mr. Treecraft joined the Spokane Unitarian Church, whose very active singles group had a surplus of women 10 to 20 years his senior. This was truly a golden era for Dan. He eventually graduated from the Unitarian Church in 1997, with a degree of Critical Thinking. A doldrum period of employment coincided in the late –80s, and included a brief attempt to enter the medical industry as a nurse-aide. This proved, after all, not to be a good fit, as Dan felt compelled to take half of his charges home to provide more adequate personal nurturance, while the remainder, he felt, should be taken out over-night, and shot. From 1991 until 2009, having found his calling, Dan employed himself as an arborist, changed his legal name [to Dandelion B. Treecraft], and attempted to make an honest living providing ethical tree care. Anyone who’s attempted to make a living – ethically – can attest that it is no small feat. Mr. Treecraft’s scorecard, here, looks fairly good – if graded on a –curve’. He was pleased, though, that many of his clients also became enduring friends.  In 1991, while pruning an ancient apple tree for a frugal-but-charming South Hill matron, Dan met his second-wife-to-be. Nearly eight years passed, before she managed to come to Dan’s attention again. Jan and Dan were married on the Autumnal Equinox, 2001, a pot luck affair which drew a crowd of well under one thousand. The next nine years passed in what appeared to be sublime, flawless bliss. Both Treecrafts were generally satisfied to let that appearance prevail. MORE