The living god-king of Philadelphia hipsters recently jumped the shark in the most embarrassing manner possible.
You know who I mean. He needs no introduction. Yesterday he was the maharaja of Philly cool, the super-groovy gossip blogger, the dude who put the “pst” into hipster. Today he’s snot on a crack whore’s stocking.
His crime against credibility? In a horrifically badly judged Philadelphia magazine advertorial, the god-king posed in the back of a “free” car — ridiculously resplendent in his trademark ironic girl’s coat and not-so-ironic no-sex specs — and gushed about his sponsors’ products (go to www.philadelphiawilldo.com for the gory details).
We felt betrayed. Stabbed through the heart. Jesus never shilled. Che Guevara never sucked corporate cock. But perhaps we shouldn’t have been shocked. The god-king’s motto has always been, “Real life is not Fugazi” (Fugazi being a punk band from a very long time ago that had politics and principles and shit like that).
And you know what? I think the god-king is right. Real life is not Fugazi. Real life is… oh let me think now. Wait, I have it.
Real life is K-Fed.