Readers Write: Me Talk Pretty Some Day

The Dean Is Not Amusedchristgau.jpg

Dear Jonathan,
Your notes got a few things wrong, but it’s always been my supicion [sic] that the summation method often beats the direct quote method anyway. Thanks for doing it.
Robert Christgau

Dear Dean of American Rock Critics,
Okay, so what’s my grade, Dean?
Jonathan Valania

Dear Jonathan,
I never give them out.
Robert Christgau

Dear Dean of American Rock Critics,
Dag. I really did want one, just for bragging rights. I give it a solid B, woulda been great with the Q&A or written as such but in a forum that would allow a little more depth and inside-baseball. Sometimes the big one gets away. For what it’s worth, you were one of the big ones. And I’ve interviewed Brian Wilson and Tom Waits several times. Anyway, thanks for playing.
Jonathan Valania

Dear Jonathan
The piece was fine–definitely a B, that’s easy. It’s the higher and finer gradations that take more time, thought, and comparison. People think it’s so easy. Say you’re definitely in the running for a B plus, OK? Maybe higher when I reread it in my dotage.
Robert Christgau

Our First International Fan Letter

Hi Phawker!
You know, if my cellphone could blow me…I’d never be able to pay the bill each month, I’d be cut off.
Scot Dantzer, The Last German In Germantown

Dear Scot,
Despite the name, it’s not that kind of a site. Sorry. But thanks for writing all the way from Germany!
The Editor

Good Ol’ a.d. Offers Encouragement

Re: A Phawker Is Born
no sir
it’s not
you should take a month off and get this right
i wasn’t being mean
A.D. Amorosi

Dearest AD,
Yes it is. Stop using IE and get with the winning team, you old bat!
PS I’m not being mean either.

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